Crap happens

I ended up getting sick Tuesday evening and waking up Wednesday feeling even worse. In some ways I was grateful I had a cold because it explained the weird things that had been happening to me during the previous week. My left eye started twitching (and still is) and I had joint pain on nearly every joint on my right side– from my deltoid, elbow, knee, and even my ankle would randomly give out underneath me and cause me extreme pain. Combined with that was extreme fatigue. I couldn’t get through a day without sleeping; it was starting to feel like the days of baby exhaustion. So when the cold hit me, those other things made more sense and I’m hoping once I’m 100% I won’t have any more twitching in my eye, pain in my joints or sleepy days. I’m already feeling an uptick in my energy and I haven’t had too much joint pain for the past two to three days so I think, despite sounding awful, that I’m on the mend for whatever this bug is. The eye twitching continues though… so I’m praying I get better fast because I may not leave this cold with my sanity intact. ;). Anyway, Wednesday, while feeling awful, received a text from a friend. Andy had taken Maverick with him to Max’s football scrimmage where our friends were going to take him with them to church once their scrimmage ended. Maverick was goofing around with their kids and climbing up the chain link fence (even though both Andy, I, and the Rogers have told them not to). Maverick thought it would be fun to jump from the top of the fence. He didn’t land well and fell to his wrist, where, as the picture shows, he broke his arm. Specifically it was a Distal radius salter Harris type 2, or in lay man’s terms a chip off of one of the arm bones right where it connects to the growth plate. The orthopedist and Andy said it doesn’t seem to be in a spot that would cause problems. So we’re hoping for the best. He’ll have to be in a cast for six weeks so he’s missing out on baseball season, but he’s having a good attitude about it. He has asked to keep going to the games to cheer on his teammates. I think we’ll try and make it to most of them. He also had to take a week off from piano, but I think he can get back to it and work on right hand and learning left hand notes this next week. He stayed home Thursday because the pain was too much to focus at school. I really enjoyed having him home. We played his made up Star Wars game, watched Mandalorian, where he commented on the space craft. He said, “In the movie, she has to push some buttons to get the wings to go down, but in real life, I have to push them down with my hands.” I thought it was the oxy talking, but Andy said he probably still had a bit of ketamine in his system. Then while I was playing his made up game with him, he said, pointing to his broken arm, “This was a really good arm. I liked this arm.” I have to admit, he was keeping me entertained. My mom said, “Sorry you have to have a kid home, I know that interrupts your schedule.” And normally she’d be right about that, but I was feeling so crummy, it was nice to have someone home with me. Despite still being in pain, he wanted to go to school on Friday because they were having a test and making a fall treat. I think he’s really enjoyed all the love and compassion people have given him and he’s been really good about looking for the silver lining even though he’s in pain and has to miss out on a few things. “Everyone has been so nice to me, I want to make sure they know I’m grateful.” He’s helped me refocus my energy on looking for the positive around me. I have learned (unfortunately through many mistakes on my part) that we lift ourselves and those around us up by looking for the good they do and the good in them. I need to do better at vocalizing the good I see.

I recently finished reading a book called, “The Midnight Library.” In the book the main character says, ” It is quite a revelation to discover that the place you wanted to escape to is the exact same place you escaped from. That the prison wasn’t the place, but the perspective.” I have learned this and seem to have to relearn this time and time again. It just goes to show you that us humans need a lot of reminding and reteaching. Gives me a bit more patience for reteaching or reminding my kids to do the same thing week after week. I’m not that much better. I highly recommend that book, by the way. It starts off kind of bleak, but the message is holds is powerful and offered in such a way that you won’t leave reading that book without a better perspective on life.

I guess it’s fitting that this week I’ve been reading General Conference talks to get ready for the upcoming conference and two of the talks focused on how trials can turn for our good. I have seen this time and time again. In fact, I know I’ve mentioned this story here, but I’m going to do a quick recap, because it is obvious this is something I need to refocus on. When really struggling in the depths of the 2020 pandemic, I asked Andy for a priesthood blessing. In the blessing he encouraged me to look for the blessings I have from trials I’ve already been through. I remember feeling bitter at this guidance. I wanted him to fix my problem, not tell me to think about other problems. But I softened my heart and followed the direction and began to keep a gratitude journal. I wrote down daily pieces of gratitude, but then I began to think about old wounds and the good that has come from them. I also started thinking about the good in myself and those around me. It was amazing how it not only helped me see that God had his hand in my life, but it changed the very way I viewed the world. Consequently, the relationships in my life began to heal and blossom. Positivity and light are far more uplifting than focusing on what is wrong or could go wrong.